Smash Bros Character Checklist: The F-Zero Series

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Unfortunately, we must once again talk about what could have been, rather than what could be. Because much like my Star Fox character pick, my F-Zero pick was de-confirmed almost immediately upon Smash Ultimate’s official reveal at E3. It’s almost appropriate, considering the poor unfortunate soul that is the F-Zero series.

While I’m not the hugest fan of the high-speed futuristic racing titles, I would be crazy not to admit how much fun F-Zero is. My favorite is F-Zero X, and it’s one of the most impressive racing games of its era. The amount of speed and action that they made the Nintendo 64 produce from that little game cartridge is an amazing feat. But regardless of how impressive its games might be, it hasn’t prevented the series from falling on very hard times.

The most recent full release in the series is F-Zero Climax, and Japan-only title for the Game Boy Advance. The game was released in 2004, and the series has been on a fourteen year hiatus since then. Fans are always eager to hear from Nintendo about a new F-Zero game, but aside from appearances in Nintendo Land and Mario Kart 8, there is only silence coming from the Big N on the status of the series.

As if to reflect this, to this day Captain Falcon remains the only representative of his home series in Smash Bros, despite being one of the original twelve characters in the first Smash game. And its odd too, considering the absolutely HUGE cast of characters F-Zero has to pick from. F-Zero X alone had a roster of 30 racers and vehicles, and the number only grew from there.

But this leads to the question of who to pick for Smash Bros. Much like the Captain himself, there’s very little reference material to go off of when it would come to building a Smash moveset for an F-Zero racer. After all, most of the action they experience takes place behind the wheel of a vehicle. They would more or less have to be an original character to Smash, and it would take a lot of work to build a play style for them. But honestly, I thought of the perfect one!

One of the original F-Zero pilots from the SNES, it’s the one and only Samurai Goroh!

CharacterChecklistGoroh

But like I said, this is a discussion of what could have been. Goroh has been an Assist Trophy in every Smash game since the concept was introduced. And unfortunately, Smash Ultimate is no different. It’s really a shame too, because I think he could make for a unique character.

Of course, sword-wielding fighters are no strangers to the Smash series. Some even argue that there are too many of them, and adding Goroh to the mix would only make people angry. But you could easily add a twist to the character that would make him vastly different from every other sword user.

When summoned as an Assist in Smash, Samurai Goroh will run and jump around, haphazardly swinging his sword at anyone and anything. And THAT is what would make him a great playable fighter. While most sword users in Smash sport elements of skill, technique, and grace with their movesets, making Goroh completely wild and angry, or even a little silly and clumsy, would be a perfect way to make him his own character.

Just imagine something like King Dedede, a character that sports both brute strength and several goofy elements to his play style and animations. Now take away his hammer and give him a katana, and you’re all set! You’ve got a fantastic concept for a sword-wielding fighter that doesn’t blend into a cast filled with Links and Fire Emblem characters with Down-B Counters.

Sadly though, the day that we might see Goroh get promoted from an Assist Trophy to a playable character will have to be some other time in the future, continuing the trend of abusing F-Zero. And you know what the worst part of all this? I meant to post this BEFORE I posted the Earthbound Character Checklist, and I forgot. Even I’M being mean to F-Zero! It was completely unintentional, I swear!

Well, before any die-hard F-Zero lovers come at with torches and pitchforks, I’m gonna skedaddle. Be sure to let me know what you think of my idea! Sparky is signing off for now!

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